The Ceremony
Since we aren't religious, it really cuts into the length of the ceremony. I don't want it to be just our vows and the basics, because that would take all of 5 minutes and that's just too short of a ceremony if you ask me.
I found a great website that lists tons and tons of readings that can be incorporated into the ceremony. Here are just a few that I really like.
I found a great website that lists tons and tons of readings that can be incorporated into the ceremony. Here are just a few that I really like.
Polish Tradition
I'm Polish and I thought it could be neat to incorporate some type of Polish tradition since we aren't going to do the dollar dance.
I found this online. It's called Sharing the Bread, Salt and Wine. It's meant for the reception though, which could be a good idea since we also aren't going to do a garter or bouquet toss.
Sharing the Bread, Salt and Wine
When the bride and groom enter the reception, there is a table with two glasses of wine, two pieces of bread, a small bowl of salt, and a silver coin.
Bread - the bride and groom must eat a piece of bread and the officiant or DJ says "May you never go hungry."
Wine - bride and groom must sip the wine so they may "Enjoy the sweetness of life."
Salt - bride and groom must put a small pinch of salt on their tongues so they "May overcome the bitterness in life."
Coin - bride and groom must hold their right hands together with the coin clasped between them to signify "May you be wealthy with good health and never be in financial stress."
I found this online. It's called Sharing the Bread, Salt and Wine. It's meant for the reception though, which could be a good idea since we also aren't going to do a garter or bouquet toss.
Sharing the Bread, Salt and Wine
When the bride and groom enter the reception, there is a table with two glasses of wine, two pieces of bread, a small bowl of salt, and a silver coin.
Bread - the bride and groom must eat a piece of bread and the officiant or DJ says "May you never go hungry."
Wine - bride and groom must sip the wine so they may "Enjoy the sweetness of life."
Salt - bride and groom must put a small pinch of salt on their tongues so they "May overcome the bitterness in life."
Coin - bride and groom must hold their right hands together with the coin clasped between them to signify "May you be wealthy with good health and never be in financial stress."
i carry your heart. - e.e. cummings
i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere you go my dear, and whatever is done, is only by me is your doing, my darling)
i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the rot and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
i am never without it (anywhere you go my dear, and whatever is done, is only by me is your doing, my darling)
i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet)
i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the rot and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)
Reading - Blessing of the Hands
These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow and forever. These are the hands that work alongside yours, as together you build a future. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you throughout the years, and with that slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will hold you when you fear or grief fills your mind. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and tears of joy. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children. These are the hands that will help you to hold your family as one. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.
Our Ceremony
Here is the ceremony that we chose. Tom has decided to write his own vows so they are not on here yet, as I'm sure he won't tell me what they are until that day. Many, many thanks to Sucrets for posting her ceremony as I took the majority of ours from there.
Welcome/Introduction
Welcome. We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life’s greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite Nichole and Tom in marriage.
A marriage is a bond to be entered into only after considerable thought and reflection. It is the most fragile of relationships and the strongest. It’s fragile because it requires exactly the right mix of freedom and interdependence, of caring and sharing, of being together and of being alone. As with any aspect of life, it has its cycles, its ups and downs, its trials and triumphs.
We hope that the words and spirit of our gathering may be filled with a truth that will deepen with the passing years. We hope, too, that the meaning of the vows that Nichole and Tom are about to share with one another will deepen as well, as they discover the endless possibilities of life together.
Reading #1 – Louis de Bernieres from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – read by:
Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathless, its is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any fool can do.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love is burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Love is the roots that grow towards each other underground, slowly and determined. And when the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, you find you are no longer two, but one. One root, one tree, one love.
Reading #2 – A Recipe for a Good Marriage – Author Unknown – read by:
The recipe for a good marriage is as follows.
Ingredients:
4 lbs. of love
1 lb. butter of youth
½ lb. of good looks
1 lb. sweet temper
1 lb. blindness of faults
1 lb. of self forgetfulness
1 lb. good wit
1 lb. of good humor
2 tbs. of sweet argument
1 pint of rippling laughter
1 wine glass of common sense
1 oz. modesty
Directions: Put the love, good looks, and sweet temper into a well-furnished home. Beat the butter of youth to a cream and mix well together with the blindness of faults. Stir the pounded wit and good humor into the sweet argument, then add the rippling laughter and common sense. Work everything together until its mixed well. Bake forever, gently.
Wedding Vows
Tom and Nichole, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make a glorious union, and it is by love that your marriage shall endure.
Tom’s:
(to be entered)
Nichole’s:
Tom, I promise to love you with all my heart and mind and strength. I vow to be your best friend and do everything in my power to make you as happy as I am today. I will trust you with my dreams, and support you in fulfilling yours. Before us lies an open road; a road full of adventures, challenges, and love. I promise that whatever adventures and challenges we face, we will face them together. You are the one I admire, the one I love. You are the one I choose to go on with forever; from now until the end of my life.
Exchange of Rings
A perfect circle symbolizes eternity: no beginning and no end. These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love is freely given and has no beginning and no end. Love freely given has no giver and no receiver – for each is the giver and each is the receiver.
May these rings remind you always of the vows you have taken here today, and that where ever you go, you will always return to each other’s love.
Tom, place this ring on Nichole’s finger and repeat after me:
I give you this ring/ as a symbol of my love and faithfulness./ As I place it on your finger,/ I commit my heart and soul to you./ I ask you to wear this ring/as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today.
Nichole, place this ring on Tom’s finger and repeat after me:
I give you this ring/ as a symbol of my love and faithfulness./ As I place it on your finger,/ I commit my heart and soul to you./ I ask you to wear this ring/as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today.
Declaration of Marriage
Before pronouncing you husband and wife, I’d like for us to consider these words:
Marriage means being in love for the rest of your life.
Marriage is walking hand in hand together.
Its laughing with each other about silly things with care and tenderness.
It’s “getting over” disappointments and hurts, knowing these are present in all relationships.
It’s the realization that there is no one else in the world that you’d rather be with than the one you are married to.
It’s thinking of new things to do together; its growing old together.
Marriage is being in love for the rest of your life.
Tom and Nichole, you have made your marriage vows to one another, witnessed by your guests. You have sealed your vows with the giving and receiving of rings. So now, by the power vested in me by the state of Pennsylvania, I pronounce you husband and wife. Please seal your promise with a kiss.
First Kiss
Recessional
Welcome/Introduction
Welcome. We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life’s greatest moments, to give recognition to the worth and beauty of love, and to add our best wishes to the words which shall unite Nichole and Tom in marriage.
A marriage is a bond to be entered into only after considerable thought and reflection. It is the most fragile of relationships and the strongest. It’s fragile because it requires exactly the right mix of freedom and interdependence, of caring and sharing, of being together and of being alone. As with any aspect of life, it has its cycles, its ups and downs, its trials and triumphs.
We hope that the words and spirit of our gathering may be filled with a truth that will deepen with the passing years. We hope, too, that the meaning of the vows that Nichole and Tom are about to share with one another will deepen as well, as they discover the endless possibilities of life together.
Reading #1 – Louis de Bernieres from Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – read by:
Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathless, its is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any fool can do.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love is burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Love is the roots that grow towards each other underground, slowly and determined. And when the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, you find you are no longer two, but one. One root, one tree, one love.
Reading #2 – A Recipe for a Good Marriage – Author Unknown – read by:
The recipe for a good marriage is as follows.
Ingredients:
4 lbs. of love
1 lb. butter of youth
½ lb. of good looks
1 lb. sweet temper
1 lb. blindness of faults
1 lb. of self forgetfulness
1 lb. good wit
1 lb. of good humor
2 tbs. of sweet argument
1 pint of rippling laughter
1 wine glass of common sense
1 oz. modesty
Directions: Put the love, good looks, and sweet temper into a well-furnished home. Beat the butter of youth to a cream and mix well together with the blindness of faults. Stir the pounded wit and good humor into the sweet argument, then add the rippling laughter and common sense. Work everything together until its mixed well. Bake forever, gently.
Wedding Vows
Tom and Nichole, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make a glorious union, and it is by love that your marriage shall endure.
Tom’s:
(to be entered)
Nichole’s:
Tom, I promise to love you with all my heart and mind and strength. I vow to be your best friend and do everything in my power to make you as happy as I am today. I will trust you with my dreams, and support you in fulfilling yours. Before us lies an open road; a road full of adventures, challenges, and love. I promise that whatever adventures and challenges we face, we will face them together. You are the one I admire, the one I love. You are the one I choose to go on with forever; from now until the end of my life.
Exchange of Rings
A perfect circle symbolizes eternity: no beginning and no end. These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love is freely given and has no beginning and no end. Love freely given has no giver and no receiver – for each is the giver and each is the receiver.
May these rings remind you always of the vows you have taken here today, and that where ever you go, you will always return to each other’s love.
Tom, place this ring on Nichole’s finger and repeat after me:
I give you this ring/ as a symbol of my love and faithfulness./ As I place it on your finger,/ I commit my heart and soul to you./ I ask you to wear this ring/as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today.
Nichole, place this ring on Tom’s finger and repeat after me:
I give you this ring/ as a symbol of my love and faithfulness./ As I place it on your finger,/ I commit my heart and soul to you./ I ask you to wear this ring/as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today.
Declaration of Marriage
Before pronouncing you husband and wife, I’d like for us to consider these words:
Marriage means being in love for the rest of your life.
Marriage is walking hand in hand together.
Its laughing with each other about silly things with care and tenderness.
It’s “getting over” disappointments and hurts, knowing these are present in all relationships.
It’s the realization that there is no one else in the world that you’d rather be with than the one you are married to.
It’s thinking of new things to do together; its growing old together.
Marriage is being in love for the rest of your life.
Tom and Nichole, you have made your marriage vows to one another, witnessed by your guests. You have sealed your vows with the giving and receiving of rings. So now, by the power vested in me by the state of Pennsylvania, I pronounce you husband and wife. Please seal your promise with a kiss.
First Kiss
Recessional
